Quirky Lirky

"Be happy for no reason, like a child. If you are happy for a reason, you’re in trouble, because that..."

Fri, 24 May 2013 19:36:26 -0700

“Be happy for no reason, like a child. If you are happy for a reason, you’re in trouble, because that reason can be taken from you.”

- Deepak Chopra (via onlinecounsellingcollege)

Today I had a peaceful day out by myself. I felt hunger again, literally and figuratively. I went to...

Thu, 23 May 2013 20:43:33 -0700

Today I had a peaceful day out by myself. I felt hunger again, literally and figuratively. I went to the museum to peruse the new exhibition there, and felt strong deja vu when I checked out the permanent exhibits because almost everything there was the exact same as what I have seen before/in the Seattle Art Museum, and I had to leave. I was so hungry and deja vu made me feel a little delirious, so I booked it. I probably looked like a crazed, deranged person just confusedly powerwalking towards the nearest exit. That was at the end of my visit to the museum. I loved the time I spent there, thought it might have been too soon for me to be around so many people. I just want to be alone, not quite yet ready to be alone in a crowd of people. On the bright side, I didn’t get hit on because the special exhibit was full of old people who had too much time on their hands and too many vision problems, so I didn’t get hit on, but did get my personal space invaded very often when they had to lean in real close to read the paintings’ descriptions.

I missed the city a lot. A LOT. I like the feeling of being lost in a city, in its vibrancy, in the crowds of tourists with too many shopping bags to carry and their huge backpacks with their equally huge cameras snapping pictures of everything, in the crowds with homeless people who have everything from musical acts to their pet cats trying to panhandle some spare change, to the dozens of different languages I can hear from walking just one street block. Having a day out was exhausting, but also rejuvenating. I was reacquainted with the city, and fell back in love with it. Oddly enough, I also felt more comfortable being stared at/ogled by men, because I just don’t give a damn. Stare at me all you want, but know that I have no interest in you, and I don’t look pretty/dress up for you. I do it for myself. I felt much more confidence than I used to, because I have stopped giving very many shits at all due to the fact that I shouldn’t have to. I will forever continue to hear the incessant “you’re so fat, look at your double chin” and these insults to my physical appearance from my mother, but I know these things come from a place of her own self-hatred, not because I am fat and have a double chin (and anyways, you can’t really exercise your jowls away - how would you even do that?). From the stares I get from men on the street, even while wearing inconspicuous clothing and an oversize jacket, I know that me being ugly isn’t true. She’s just bitter.

Over the course of the very short year, I’ve realized I gained a lot of self-confidence. I still don’t know what I want to do in life, or what I want period, but I know that I’ve gained a lot of self-love and self-respect. I’m not going to follow my friends to a party far away, off-campus party just because I don’t want to be alone on a Saturday night. Fuck it. I’ll do homework. I’ll play dress-up. I’ll clean my room. I’ll watch a movie. I’ve realized I lost a lot of who I am because I wanted to hang out with friends and party, which while is fun occasionally, isn’t fun all of the time because after a while, I just burn out because I do need alone time. Just to clean, or watch TV, read for fun, or do whatever the fuck I want to do. I lost my sense of self. Being at home will help me regain some of that, but with my mother’s constant nagging saying I’m fat and decreasing my rice portions to half a handful so that I could “lose weight” (aka starve), will definitely take away from that. I spend all day in two rooms, my garage, or my room, or the library (because the Wifi there is spectacular), so I could get a peace of mind and quiet, and just watch movies, go on the Internet and read all day long.

queerfabulousmermaid: objetpunka: manif3stlove: xshiromorix: ...

Wed, 22 May 2013 19:27:51 -0700

queerfabulousmermaid:

objetpunka:

manif3stlove:

xshiromorix:

Just a reminder:

When Prophet Muhammad (sallallahu alayhi wasallam) was travelling on the road with his cousin, Al-Fadl ibn Abbas, a woman stopped him to ask him a question. The woman was very beautiful, and Al-Fadl couldn’t help but stare at her.

Seeing this, Prophet Muhammad reached out his hand and turned his cousin’s face away.

He didn’t tell the woman to cover her face.

He didn’t tell her to change her clothing.

He didn’t tell her that her appearance was too tempting or indecent.

He averted his cousin’s impolite stare.

It STILL baffles me that some men think this way.

The hadith the OP is referring to is here

“[Prophet], tell believing men to lower their glances and guard their private parts: that is purer for them. God is well aware of everything they do.” -Qur’an 24:30

Translation: Ain’t shit niggas y’all been seent

"Did you know, you can quit your job, you can leave university? You aren’t legally required to have a..."

Wed, 22 May 2013 18:11:17 -0700

“

Did you know, you can quit your job, you can leave university? You aren’t legally required to have a degree, it’s a social pressure and expectation, not the law, and no one is holding a gun to your head. You can sell your house, you can give up your apartment, you can even sell your vehicle, and your things that are mostly unnecessary. You can see the world on a minimum wage salary, despite the persisting myth, you do not need a high paying job. You can leave your friends (if they’re true friends they’ll forgive you, and you’ll still be friends) and make new ones on the road. You can leave your family. You can depart from your hometown, your country, your culture, and everything you know. You can sacrifice. You can give up your $5.00 a cup morning coffee, you can give up air conditioning, frequent consumption of new products. You can give up eating out at restaurants and prepare affordable meals at home, and eat the leftovers too, instead of throwing them away. You can give up cable TV, Internet even. This list is endless. You can sacrifice climbing up in the hierarchy of careers. You can buck tradition and others’ expectations of you. You can triumph over your fears, by conquering your mind. You can take risks. And most of all, you can travel. You just don’t want it enough. You want a degree or a well-paying job or to stay in your comfort zone more. This is fine, if it’s what your heart desires most, but please don’t envy me and tell me you can’t travel…

So please say to me, “I want to travel, but other things are more important to me and I’m putting them first”, not, “I’m dying to travel, but I can’t”, because I have yet to have someone say they can’t, who truly can’t. You can, however, only live once, and for me, the enrichment of the soul that comes from seeing the world is worth more than a degree that could bring me in a bigger paycheck, or material wealth, or pleasing society. Of course, you must choose for yourself, follow your heart’s truest desires, but know that you can travel, you’re only making excuses for why you can’t. And if it makes any difference, I have never met anyone who has quit their job, left school, given up their life at home, to see the world, and regretted it. None. Only people who have grown old and regretted never traveling, who have regretted focusing too much on money and superficial success, who have realized too late that there is so much more to living than this.

”

- Wunderkammer: Did You Know (via wendesgray)

Reflection 2.0

Wed, 22 May 2013 17:52:00 -0700

When I was flying home yesterday, I was mostly asleep on the plane. I was exhausted, in every way possible. I was tired of school, people, talking, explaining, interacting, acting, and everything else. I was done. I couldn’t help but fall asleep on the plane, because I just didn’t want to think anymore. To be. During the short moments I was awake, I was thinking, but mostly reflecting on my year. It was even more confusing than the last.

I don’t know what happened to myself. I seemed to have lost myself along the way, and my morals. I don’t really know what I believe anymore, but seemed to have absorbed those of my friends, my peers, of my environment. I’ve done things I never thought I would, experienced things I never envisioned myself experiencing, met great people and widened my friends circle, traveled to new places, drove great distances for fast food, and overworked myself for the pursuit of money. I did good, I did bad, I did everything in between. I was 50 shades of morally gray.

Like the last summer, I came home with nothing to do. Every time someone asked what I was going to do for the summer, I’d answer with “nothing.” Not “relaxing.” Not “reading.” Not “watching TV.” Simply “nothing.” Because I know I will do all of those things, but I want to simply indulge in the simplicity of doing absolutely, positively nothing. I will be going to concerts in the summer. I will be volunteering in the summer. I will be reading, watching TV, writing, playing dress up, cleaning, applying for jobs, and relaxing, but I don’t want to have to explain that. I shouldn’t have to. I’m too tired to answer with more than one word, because that one word encompasses all I want to do after two semesters of just doing stuff all the time.

I met a lot of great people this year. I liked some of them, disliked others, liked some more than I should have or wanted to, but never really hated anyone. I became judgmental, absorbing the increasing judgmental attitude of my close friend throughout the year. That wasn’t something I liked about myself at all. I realized I took on this attitude after I increasingly started to not care about what people thought of me. No one likes that type of person, except those same types of judgmental people. Being at home, with silence, and being shuttered from the outside world helps me reclaim a sense of self I seemed to have lost in the sea of self-consciousness, attempts to look cool, and the fear of people’s opinions of me. It’s only been a day, but I’ve recovered a lot.

I spent some time with my ex-roomie in the last few days, and she told me about how she was learning and trying to speak her mind and not give a damn about what other people thought of her opinions. Being scared of judgment is so oppressive. She has freed herself a little, and gained a lot more of her own personality as a result. I think I did the opposite to myself, I think I oppressed my own voice and opinions to cater to those who I wanted to impress. I wanted to look cool, and didn’t speak up when I should have, didn’t tell my friend she looked fat in that dress, didn’t point out problems because I was scared my friends would get upset.

Whenever people asked why I didn’t simply stay in Portland for the summer, I cited reasons like “it’s cheaper to live at home with my parents since they feed me and don’t make me pay rent,” and the fact that I needed to be away from Portland just to have mental space and clarity away from Reed. I just can’t stay in Portland when the entire city reminds me of Reed, as nice and pleasant as it is, but I still missed my home. Home for me is where I feel the most relaxed and comfortable, and while I do feel those things while at Reed, I still remember the stress and duress I’m put under during the year, and I just need to get away from that for a while before returning to do it all over again.

I don’t know what will happen in the summer. Everything is still up in the air, except for the volunteer things and concerts I’ve got lined up. I’m hoping for a job, but I’m not hoping too hard because I want to relax. Indulge in the quiet of not having to act for other people and do what I want regardless of what other people think, because there isn’t anyone around to judge me. My internet is shitty, and so my propensity to keep checking on what everyone else is doing will be minimal. I can really focus on me, and doing things that will help me be myself again. I can relearn who I am and what I want without the eyes of the world staring in to judge me. I am no longer in a glass house, but one that has been covered up with dark curtains to allow for privacy in my world, and I can finally have the quiet I have needed for a long time.

marlathebigtourist: #reedcollege #rf2k13

Wed, 22 May 2013 17:27:35 -0700

marlathebigtourist:

#reedcollege #rf2k13

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Wed, 22 May 2013 16:00:27 -0700

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Wed, 22 May 2013 15:59:05 -0700

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Sat, 18 May 2013 12:43:18 -0700

tart-pastry: Robert Montgomery installs poetry in unexpected...

Sat, 18 May 2013 12:30:32 -0700

tart-pastry:

Robert Montgomery installs poetry in unexpected and unusual urban locations.

shez-a-bitch: http://shez-a-bitch.tumblr.com

Fri, 17 May 2013 05:55:32 -0700

shez-a-bitch:

http://shez-a-bitch.tumblr.com

"Take a day to heal from the lies you’ve told yourself and the ones that have been told to you."

Fri, 17 May 2013 05:54:59 -0700

“Take a day to heal from the lies you’ve told yourself and the ones that have been told to you.”

- Maya Angelou (via creatingaquietmind)

babyferaligator: Studies show that if theres gonna be free food I will show up 100% of the time

Fri, 17 May 2013 05:36:37 -0700

babyferaligator:

Studies show that if theres gonna be free food I will show up 100% of the time

There's nothing wrong with sex, people.

Fri, 17 May 2013 05:36:35 -0700

claireruns:

thechroniclesofrin:

- Having sex every day.
- Saving sex for your wedding night.
- Never having sex.
- Having sex with different people.
- Having sex with one person.
- Having sex with a person of your same gender.
- Loving sex.
- Hating sex.
- Being loud.
- Being quiet.

The only thing wrong with sex?

When it’s not consensual.

Because that’s not sex. That’s rape.

Reblogging again because this post is so important.

anglosexual: misandryinhaiku: “women are weaklings!” i’m strong enough to carry your corpse to the...

Fri, 17 May 2013 05:34:26 -0700

anglosexual:

misandryinhaiku:

“women are weaklings!”

i’m strong enough to carry

your corpse to the woods

this haiku is my favorite haiku

"I still catch myself feeling sad about things that don’t matter anymore."

Fri, 17 May 2013 05:33:44 -0700

““I still catch myself feeling sad about things that don’t matter anymore.””

- Kurt Vonnegut (via disimba)

no matter how close i think i am with someone there’s always someone before me like i’m literally...

Fri, 17 May 2013 05:33:42 -0700

no matter how close i think i am with someone there’s always someone before me like i’m literally never someone’s first option

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Fri, 17 May 2013 05:33:40 -0700

eludednightmares: You’d know something about that wouldn’t you...

Fri, 17 May 2013 05:28:43 -0700

eludednightmares:

You’d know something about that wouldn’t you HANNAH MONTANNA

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Fri, 17 May 2013 05:27:31 -0700